You know that feeling you get when there’s a hundred tasks to accomplish, but you don’t know where to start?

The devil on one shoulder says if you don’t do it all, you’re a failure, everything rests on you, and what’s everyone going to think. Meanwhile, the angel on the other shoulder says you don’t have to do it all, just do one thing at a time, it’s ok, there’s grace.

If I didn’t make some changes, the devil was going to win.

I felt guilty because we scaled way back on produce this summer, but I knew I couldn’t do it and that meant I couldn’t open the farm stand as much because there’s no product to put in there and our sweet corn was a flop this year too unfortunately. The devil wanted me to despair that I was disappointing people and they wouldn’t understand.

However, with making our beef a priority—which we are passionate about raising—plus meat chickens and laying hens while Tom worked 12 hour days off the farm, the focus on the garden had to take a backseat along with opening up the farm stand on a regular basis. People understood.

I had to learn this summer that I couldn’t do it all or I would go crazy and wouldn’t serve anyone well….

Add then add in young kids, it made me embrace that I couldn’t do it all in the time I wanted. With constant interruptions and life, it would need to wait until it was the right time without worrying about it. I can’t control the interruptions, they’re going to happen no matter what. I had to learn to plan for another to get something done (e.g., for example farm office work).

And then there’s school for our oldest, homeschooling our 5-year-old and a toddler, farming chores, house chores, unexpected emergencies, etc., it’s a challenge to do it all.

Some days it can feel like you’re fighting to get one thing done All.Day.Long.

I’ve had to adjust and manage my expectations so that they’re not so high and sitting on top of Mount Everest, where it might take me years to reach, whatever that means actually when you’re there? Let me know if you ever get to Mount Everest HA.

And most women feel like they’re constantly on trial. You feel judged by how well your kids behave and perform, how you look and act, how your house looks, and on and on and on it goes. Trust me, if you have kids and you’re home all day with them, you’ll clean something and in the next 10 min., it’s a mess again.

And just like you, I can become very frustrated and overwhelmed when those goals aren’t meant, it can become very easy to give up.

Through it all though, I learned this summer I can’t do it all and that’s a good thing. Everything does not rest of my shoulders.

Sometimes I’ll do the right thing, sometimes I’ll mess up. But in each and every case, I get the chance to fix it tomorrow because there are new mercies every morning.

You stumble, you fail, you try again, you fix it, you tweak it. Rinse and repeat.

We all have an idealistic perfectionism that we all try to attain, but fail miserably at. Can we master all things and do them all perfectly well? I know I can’t.

I know my story isn’t unique. I know you’ve probably had to battle through realizing you couldn’t do it all either.

Everyone does.

That means asking for help when you need it without any shame, scaling back on work load to give your attention to something else, adjusting expectations, or taking a leap of faith and going in an entirely new direction and depending on God to help get you through it.

When I say I’m okay with not being able to do it all, I don’t mean it doesn’t still bother me. It does. But, I’ve realized over time that I have to set my priorities and I can’t worry myself sick over things. I still try my best and I encourage you to as well, but with a whole lot more grace.

So keep your chin up, pray, love your family, spouse, children, and keep on keeping on.

What are some ways you’ve learned the hard way that you can’t do it all?

Warmly,

Tessa